So I Can Remember Us This Way, Broke But Full of Dreams
Note: I almost never rhyme because it’s hard for me to pull it off in a sophisticated manner. This came out of nowhere, and the rhyming was surprisingly easy. It is NOT very strong as a poem. It’s what it is. And it is slightly corny. Sad, but true.
So I Can Remember Us This Way, Broke But Full of Dreams
I hope after years together, one day
When we are old and slightly gray,
When wrinkles tease our eyes,
And we have learned to be wise,
Your hand would still find my hand
With age spots and a wedding band,
While you drive through these hills,
Without discussions of rent or bills,
Only fading thoughts of a ripe memory
Of our young faces drowned in worry,
And today’s escape for a dusk drive
To a place where rich people thrive,
Our pockets empty, loans accrued
Our eyes hungry, our gazes crude.
Yes, when we’re old and satisfied
You must drive me again to this hillside,
And as you swerve, you must say,
Remember that late afternoon in May,
When we were broke and ashamed
Of our discomfort, lives unframed?
Remember how we watched these houses,
With private driveways, courts, and lounges?
How we worked overtime and saved each dollar,
Our unrewarding careers, nine to five, white collar?
Yes, I hope you bring me here once more,
When we have aged and our dreams are secure,
And we watch the sunset quietly
Thinking of this day, a memory.
I quite like this. But I guess your negative build-up was smart, I was expecting something bad, but found something quite hopeful in just the right way. Really liked the procession of questions at the end!
Not corny. simple and touching. : )
lol @ Fraz: But I guess your negative build-up was smart, I was expecting something bad.
As I told you, this is not sappy, its cute. And if you can pass something you think is sappy as cute, that’s enough to make it good
I really like how economics becomes a major part of your work so often. we tend to leave it out of literature so much because it just doesn’t seem romantic enough. But you’ve managed to make it romantic and highlight a pretty pragmatic part of everyone’s life.