Fear
Fear
There is one last
Ember in the fire.
It smolders and glows,
Fierce, fiery flecks
Float in the air.
They reflect
A mocking, orange light.
His words leap like flames,
Hover over my silent lips,
Dance around
My dulled senses.
They find my cold hands
And offer to help me
With their burning warmth.
I look at him
With empty eyes
And hold his words
Gingerly
As though they are
Holy water
Instead of wild flames.
The fire is slowly dying
As I tell him
There is nothing
To help with
Here.
And I watch the last ember
So I don’t have to
See his eyes,
Because
I’m afraid of what is in them.
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Categories: Poems
Beautiful illiteration:
Fierce, fiery flecks
Float in the air.
I really liked this part:
I look at him
With empty eyes
And hold his words
Gingerly
As though they are
Holy water
Instead of wild flames.
I really feel the fear and caution in the poem and for some reason it kinda makes me want to cry
Good work. I love the idea of words and flames intertwined togethe like mating serpents. beautiful lines here:
“His words leap like flames,
Hover over my silent lips,
Dance around
My dulled senses.’
Gorgeous!
However, I feel this poem lacks the power, the impact of your other works. I thought smoldering fire and embers was a bit cliched. But I LOVE the query at the end, the dangling edge of a dying thread…
8/10
Beautiful!
I agree with Sidra. It does leave you with a sad feeling.
I simply love the end… very well done!
‘And I watch the last ember
So I don’t have to
See his eyes,
Because
I’m afraid of what is in them.’
aye haye it’s not THAT sad. but thank you for your comments. : )
uffffffffff. OUCHHH!!!!
Hmm..its good…the ending needs more impact…kickass nonetheless.
and yeah…i know its about vampires and all…why dont you put in something about the dying warmth and all…my brain never works…but im sure you can make out what im trying to say.